Lavatory Libations

Okay, help me out with this one. During my tour of Juno screenings, I went to use the washroom in a movie theater and made the oddest discovery. Just so I’ve set the location perfectly – This is a multi-level Cineplex located inside an upscale downtown mall. It’s a nice place. It’s a Monday night. And yet there is an empty glass jug of wine sitting on the toilet in one stall… and an empty mini-bottle of gin sitting on the floor of the neighboring stall. Is this some sort of alcoholic glory hole that I’m unaware of? Are people boozing it up for Beowulf? Presumably, the movie theater is just as good a location to get ripped as the lavatory. Unless… oh wait, it just hit me. People are filling their soda fountain cups with cheap booze in the bathroom before entering the theater armed and ready… Wow. Coming from a guy whose first kiss was in a movie theater (“Don’t Tell Mom The Babysitter’s Dead”), I am heartbroken that the classic make-out session in the back row has become a threesome with Carlo Rossi.