FOOT MODELS

gillette commercial

Two professional hard asses battle late night at a tennis court over who's going to shave their head. I lost

Experience The Change (Cheeto's Commercial)

Jbeall a professional hardass meets his match in a cave only to find out, he can't out run his hunger.

FOOT MODELS a screenplay by Jacob Jones and Jeremy Beall

A screenplay written by Jacob Jones and Jeremy Beall
furiouslyread@gmail.com and aggressiveliterature@ymail.com
Copyrighted November 19, 2008
INT. -- LUXURY SKY RISE APARTMENT -- DAY
DEEN is jogging on a treadmill reading a bible. He glances up to look out the view of his sky rise aptartment.
INT. -- LOW INCOME HOUSING NORTH EASTERN MANHATTAN -- DAY
RYTAN looks at himself in the mirror and puts on a fake mink coat. His cell rings.
RYAN
I know I wont be late. Ill be their in a minute.
Ryan lights up a smoke and walks out his apartment door.
EXT. -- BASKET BALL COURT -- DAY
An eye-appealing bare foot covered in sweat pivots to the side slowly as a man exhales dramatically. The man licks sweat beads off his upper lip then slides his foot in a clear shoe that automatically forms to his foot.
As an eagle screams a hand grips on a basket ball tenaciously squeezing it. The man’s lower half takes off leaping from the half court mark. His legs spread and he vertically climbs into the air.
While slam dunking the basket ball a back board shatters. An athletic model wearing luxurious and gaudy basket ball shoes casually walks to the half court mark drops the ball and rests his foot on it.
DIRECTOR
Alright cut!
The Director is big bald and sweating. He chews on a cigar and speaks from the side of his mouth.
DIRECTOR
Ryan, get in there. Hurry up continuity baby.
Ryan, an overweight but, athletic foot model wearing a shirt with a keg on it walks up to the marker and places his foot on the ball. The athletic model takes his foot off the ball and walks away.
DIRECTOR
The camera is rolling keep the ball still! Rolling... Action!
Ryan, wearing the new clear shoe, places his foot on the ball. A gold logo flashes across the shoe and it glistens in the spotlight.
RAYN (V.O.)
That’s me.
The athletic model walks up to the camera.
RYA
Not the model, the foot. I’ve been told that I have beautiful feet my whole life. I’ve never had an ingrown toe nail or bunions.
The director moves away from his camera and quickly shuffles to another one pointed at Ryan’s foot.
RAYN
It’s my job to make sure my foot looks better than yours.
DIRECTOR
Go ahead. Look at it!.. Look at it!!!
An Assistant Director measures the light by Ryan’s foot. The director twists his cigar and smiles with content as his assistant director gives him a thumbs up.
DIRECTOR
I know it’s hard to look away when you see a foot that fucking perfect.
The Assistant Director, wearing a microphone headset, walks up to a small video monitor and looks closer at the image of Ryan’s foot.
ASSISTANT DIRECTOR
(softly)
It’s so perfect.
Ryan holds his foot on the basket ball as the director zooms in on a the futuristic bubble wrap looking new basket ball shoe.
RYAN
It’s no surprise I can make a living just modeling my feet. The pedicures, creams and unique cosmetics keep these puppies looking fresh.
As Ryan walks away from the basket ball he spins it with his foot. The director with camera in hand follows Ryan’s foot steps away from the spinning ball.
Pictures of Ryan’s foot are shown by a hand opening a photo album. The hand flips through pages comprised of foot photos. Each photo has it’s own distinct design and setting.
RYAN (V.O.)
(bragging)
From my knees down I’ve been in commercials all over the world and featured in every magazine you could think of. I’m even on the cover of the 2004 June addition of National geographic.
On the cover of the national geographic is a picture of a man spitting fire.
RYAN (V.O.)
In the crowd behind the starving children. I’m the foot wearing Croc sandals. That’s my foot. Oh, and in the Friend’s second season third episode, Chandler stumps his toe and for one second there is a close up on what you think is his foot... That’s my foot.
A director holding the camera on Ryan’s foot wipes his brow.
DIRECTOR
(shouts)
Alright cut!
The director puts on shades and a top hat the walks up to Ryan. The director extends his arm to shake Ryan’s hand.
DIRECTOR
Beautiful baby. Nice spin on that ball.
RYAN
Just one of my many talents.
DIRECTOR
When you showed just a little bit of the soul. Perfect. That’s what I want. Just take ten and we will do the shot one more time. Perfection baby it’s got to be perfect.
Ryan watches a man beside the craft services table. He is wearing the same shoes as Ryan and shares the exact same physical build.
In appearance they are very similar with an exception of the nose. Deen, the man beside the craft service table, continues munching on snack as a seductively attractive woman approaches him. The director walks up to the craft service table and grabs a bag of chips and soda then grabs the woman’s ass. She looks at him and smiles.
DIRECTOR
Hey, Deen! Can I talk to you for a minute?
The Assistant Director leans even closer to the video monitor which is still holding an image of Rayn’s foot in the new basket ball shoe.
ASSISTANT DIRECTOR
It’s amazing what beautiful feet do for a shoe.
RYAN (V.O.)
It’s not just my feet but, my calves are perfectly in proportion to my feet sleek smooth and tan. That makes me a below the knee model. People keep telling me my thighs are too fat and my face is kinda ugly.
Ryan watches the director and his brother Deen converse over a table full of snacks.
Ryan
If it wasn't for that I would be a full body model. But, hey I’m not complaining my foot and I have done pretty well for ourselves.
Ryan speaks to the director’s camera as he watches the director talk to his brother Deen.
RAYN
When people say I’m not a model. I show them my foot.
The director shares a laugh with Deen and pats him on the back.
DIRECTOR
(loudly)
That’s why we pay you the big bucks.
The director looks down at his watch and turns to his Assistant Director.
DIRECTOR
Tell everyone they have ten minutes.
The director walks up to his female assistant who is wearing a head set and holding a coffee and turns back to Deen.
DIRECTOR
Deen, baby, your in the next shot! I’m going to let your brother take a break while I get you in some action shots. Shelly...
Shelly, An attractive woman wearing a red dress and high heels jumps to attention and acts excited to be noticed by the Director. There is a loud annoying RING. The director reaches into his pocket pulls out his phone and glances at it.
DIRECTOR
I’m going to watch that slam dunk footage on my Phone. I have to take this call. Everybody take fifteen. God I love being the man in charge.
The director gets up from his chair that reads “Man in Charge” throws open a door and heads into the rest room with Shelly on his arm. Ryan watches him walk away then looks back at the Assistant director who is still starring at the video monitor.
RYAN
(to the camera)
I was on the cover of the Berken-Stock magazine for six years straight. When they took my foot off of the front page it was only for my brother.
Ryan looks over at his brother who is eating a sandwich really fast.
RYAN
He was blessed with beautiful feet too.
Ryan looks over at Deen’s shoes then up at his calves that sparkle in the light when slightly moved.
RYAN
His name is Deen and we have been in the foot model business our whole lives.
Marv, Ryan’s agent, a fat balding man wearing a cheesy sweat suit walks in and gestures for Ryan to walk over in his direction. He speaks with an Italian accent.
MARV
Ryan! What’s the news? How’s the shoot?
Ryan looks at Marv as he starts to fill up a plate at the craft service table.
Marv
Hey, come here twinkle toes. You look like you’ve lost weight. You look great.
Marv puts his arm around Ryan’s shoulder and leads him away from the set and commercial crew.
MARV
You are going to love me. Look...
Marv struggles down a large gulp from his flask.
MARV
Uhm, little something to warm me up.
RYAN
How’s the ulcer?
Marv farts and as his butt squeaks he looks to see if anyone noticed.
MARV
Oh, the doctor gave me some pills for dat. Xanx for stress. Some Valumes for my back, Narcos for my neck and shit...
Marv stares at the label on a bottle
Marv
Something for my blood pressure.
Marv shakes the bottle rattling the pills then opens it up and guzzles some straight from the bottle.
RYAN (V.O.)
That’s my manager Marv. He raised my brother and I since we were six. Our parents were killed in a car wreck so, he’s been our foot agent pretty much our entire life. I guess you could say he’s used to dealing with beautiful feet.
INT. -- WOODY P’S -- NIGHT
The story of Marv.
Lights flash and fog rolls in from the stage were a younger thinner Marv takes off his pants and prances to a pop song. Several gay men walk up to the stage and place dollar bills in his G-string as he gratefully rubs his crotch in their face.
MARV
Easy boys look but no touch.
One older man wearing a nice suit walks up to the stage and motions for the dancer to lean down.
RICK
Your fucking hot.
The long haired Marv leans down getting close to the Rick’s face.
MARV
Thanks baby.
Rick pulls out a wad of one hundred dollar bills and slips one in Marv’s G-string.
RICK
I want you.
MARV
Like what you see stud muffin?
RICK
How much for a private dance?
Marv leads Rick to a private area in the balcony of a gay strip club. Rick sits in a chair and Marv begins to give him a lap dance. Rick looks down at Marv’s cowboy boots.
RICK
Why don’t you take your boots off cowboy?
MARV
I don’t take them off.
Rick pulls out his cash.
RICK
I bet I could persuade you.
Rick pulls out two hundred dollars.
RICK
One hundred for each boot. I want to suck your toes.
Marv hesitates then proceeds to pull off his boot with caution. After pulling off the boot Rick’s face looks shocked then quickly turns to disgusted.
RICK
God that smell.
Rick turns his head to the side and vomits.
RICK
Put your boot back on your making me sick. How can you let your feet go like that? Your like some kind of a freak.
Rick gags as Marv slides his boot back on embarrassed.
RICK
What the hell is wrong with you?
MARV
Screw you man! I’m not gay I just dance here for the cash.
Marv walks away leaving Rick throwing up in the chair. As he leaves a tear rolls down his face.
INT. -- BASKET BALL SHOE SHOOT -- DAY
Marv lights up a cigarette and puts his hand on Ryan’s shoulder.
MARV
We have a new gig. K-Mart wants to have your foot on the front of their new flip flop summer fun campaign.
RYAN
(frustrated)
Fuck K-Mart! I don’t want to model their cheap ass shit. Only poor people shop there Marv.
MARV
Hey we are talking about bread here. Who cares as long as you get paid. You can’t think every job is beneath you.
Ryan pulls back from Marv.
RYAN
I don’t know. I don’t want my foot to look low class. I’ll get stuck doing low end modeling and never be able to get the high end gigs.
MARV
You are kidding me right? I know you are sick of doing these Pay-Less shoe commercials. I’m giving you a chance to make the big bucks and hell, even get your calves shown.
Ryan looks at Marv with an open mouth.
RYAN
(surprised)
They want to go that high?
Ryan looks at his calves and flexes them.
MARV
Oh yeah. They want your lower half. Picture it to be the first thing you people see as you walk through the doors. Your beautiful lower half.
Marv puts his hand on Rayn’s shoulder. Ryan looks up and envisions the huge sign as he walks into the K-Mart.
MARV
You can’t deny that you want to show that skin. Sandals and flip flops are the future of foot wear. Trust me I been in the biz long enough to know.
Rayn looks at Marv with uncertainty.
MARV
Hey, it is how you got noticed. Not to mention your brother is making a killing showing those god given toes while you are stuck in those.
Ryan looks at the bubble wrap shoes he is wearing.
RAYN
How’s Deen?
Marv takes out a cigarette and offers Ryan one.
MARV
Your brother is doing great. In fact he is doing better than you. You two should hang out more it might just smooth up your rocky past.

The Tribe